T O P
Bridgeottoo

Fold the dishes bud


Stupid_Rednecks

Mow the carpet, vacuum the lawn


AYAYRONMESSESUP

Hang your shoes


FBIaltacct

Vacuum the driveway


hundo-_-P

Watch a book


binge360

I actually did this yesterday 😂


binge360

With a doob in hand I might add!


sackafackaboomboom

Boil all the coconuts


Appointment_Salty

Hoover the roof


french_queef22

Water your cat


miltz95

Milk the dog


VideoOrItIsntReal

Wash your soaps


MemoryFomo

Shit in the litter box


chrisragenj

Shit I do that sober


junxbarry

Finger your buttholes?


Ca1meishmael

Was worth a shot


sallysippin

Wash the dog, walk the dishes


brandimariee6

God damn I can’t stop laughing at this


Bridgeottoo

Also maybe take that extra bit of paper off before smoking as that will probably taste bad


nwordsfwme

you can’t be serious right? don’t you burn that off before smoking ?


Patasmalaps

I usually go full neanderthal and bite that shit off if not around people, otherwise I rip it if people are around


cheezeitsinmysocks

Bruh I pinch around the edges and sindge it off like a cap now I feel dumb for the extra steps


Patasmalaps

At the same time... I tend to have pretty full rolls so I rarely have a lot of paper sticking out. Maybe I'm not an expert on that front 👀


devincry3r

Lol this, usually not that much though


Desc77

This reply is about as correct as it gets I think


TheGoochDestroyer

Yeah just smoke that and go loiter in the circle k candy section until the employees get uncomfortable and tell you to leave


Afraid_of_Okapi

How dare you attack my weekend plans, I work hard.


Whiteshillongwidow

Man for first time this seems a little too huge…


Lego_Kode

First time trying edibles my brother gave me a 200mg bag of gummy worms. His words were "you can have one and see how you feel, or you can have the whole bag, you might feel like you're going to die but you'll be fine." I ate the whole bag on the way to a very large mall. Best time I've ever had there. I was toasted in a wonderful blanket of very high. Just being in that vibe is something I don't think I have felt since.


TrippyAdan

I would’ve passed out in the mall


Jake24601

Same. My first time, I legit thought the sky was falling. I looked up and it kept dropping on top of me.


Tonka-alt

It's far away, that's why it takes a long time to come all the way down


IIIlllIlIIIlllIlI

😂


[deleted]

On the toilet I became obsessed with the triangles my thumbs and pointer finger make and had a panic attack.


Jake24601

Sometimes I miss those highs but its best they're behind me now. I used to get so fucked up and become quite convinced I would die.


Azmatang

It's comforting to hear other people having the same experience as me. Literally accepting your death during a high. And then the next day, you are like lol what an idiot.


heckin_chill_4_a_sec

Are yall still talking about weed? I've been smoking for a few years now and I've never had a panic attack through it or thought I'd die or something. But some people have pretty bad stories it seems. Only once, as a teen I smoked so much so fast that my vision was like TV static and my ears were whooshing. Had to have a lie down and slept like a baby for 15 hours. But I didn't feel bad or anything, I just couldn't participate in conversation anymore so I went to sleep lmao


Lego_Kode

I had that happen, it caused a lot of anxiety. It's not the straight high that'll do it to you, it's the anxiety from that that'll convince you you're going to die.


Byeuji

I had this exact experience. Hit too hard and felt like I was going down fast, laid out on the porch to try to stabilize myself and it felt like the heavens were laying on my chest. Eventually I went inside and went to sleep on my friend's bed. An hour or two later I was able to make it home. I didn't partake for a long time after that because of how intense that feeling was.


irishflowerchild

My first gravity bong did this to me. I hit it and straight stood up and drove home two blocks away, walked straight to my bed and laid down. As soon as I saw the smoke coming out around my eyes I knew I was in trouble. I have never been that high again.


KidGorgeous19

First time I hit a gravity bong I got so high I puked. My friends older brother and his friends were fucking with me telling me I was gonna die because I overdosed. Assholes.


xLadyJunk

Happened to me when my buddy smoked me out on 4/20 a few years back. We smoked before heading to the mall, at the mall, we shared a 100mg gummy, and I essentially passed out into my coffee at the Starbucks. Buddy got it on video obviously.


Forge_craft4000

I feel like the mall would be too scary a place to go high. Too many people, too few exits and entrances, just a really claustrophobic feeling! I once had to escape my bed I felt too trapped, I can't imagine the mall being relaxing


roobopp

I would have had anxiety but acted "chill" to not alarm my friends.


RealJeil420

Smoking, you will feel it before you finish an eighth of that joint.


Lego_Kode

That's very true. I'm leaving for a new job and it was the Sous Chefs birthday. I rolled him a hemp blunt with an 8th of Romulan and 1g shatter. He said he was beyond high by the time it burnt ¼th of the way down.


ReSpekMyAuthoriitaaa

*Quarterth*


pantless_vigilante

One of the first times I got high I went to a mall. I was in such a haze that I ended up walking straight into a display window thinking it was the door and the employees laughed. I also fell asleep on a bench and had a security guard wake me up, when he woke me up I couldn't understand anything of what was happening. I think he probably thought I was on heroine or something lol


Rose2637

Similar thing happened to me. Went to prom with the group I smoked with and they gave us all an edible (at the time I literally had like 0 tolerance and had never had edible) and it was such a weird night. We went in the wrong entrance and didn’t give our tickets. Even the ones who smoked all the time were struggling lol. I felt like I was falling through a bunch of mirrors for an hour then it was all good again.


Lego_Kode

Edibles I find hit in waves. A high dose is basically you buying a ticket for a Rollercoaster but you can only guess which Rollercoaster it's going to be. Sometimes it's a nice ride, never goes too high too fast. Sometimes it's one of the most terrifying Rollercoaster you can be on.


Lostinthestarscape

On a deadly batch of cookies I once made I spent 5 hours couch locked to the point that I couldn't get up to turn off a 30 second looping DVD menu. It was absolute hell but I also "didn't want my dad to know I was high" so every time he came by to be like "uh, want me to turn that off" I'd just be like "nah, I'm about to start watching it".......I suspect he was on to me.


Lego_Kode

Lmao. I love this. The first time I got high I ended up asking my dad for 4 KFC snack wraps. When I told him later I was very high, he had no idea. But I was medical at the time I took that edible, so I wasn't necessarily worried about parents finding out.


Majestic_Horseman

I love that weed has a threshold were you go from "my face is melting" to I guess I'm not high anymore" like your body goes *nope, bro, it's too much, this is your life now* and you only feel happy high.


Lego_Kode

Lol, I gotta be in the right headspace. Edibles are like a sleeping dragon, if you're in a good place, high dose edible are a dragon that let you cuddle up next to it, a warm euphoric almost trippy feeling. But you piss off that dragon and it will fuck you the hell up. 😅 I can be really self conscious sometimes. But that edible just made me way too high to care. It was a blissful dreamlike super heavy blanket high. I went with a couple other people who were watching out for me.


ass2ass

Yeah sometimes if I get that paranoid uncomfortable self conscious feeling ill just smoke more and usually that helps.


SaintsSooners89

Damn, I was a daily toker and quit for 2 months for a job, once the boss told me he doesn't piss test, I ate a 100mg pill a buddy gave me. I sat on the couch shaking and feeling super anxious. Weed never makes me feel anxious but I was wigging out! So I don't recommend breaking a tolerance break with a 100mg edible and definitely don't recommend it for newbies.


Lego_Kode

>So I don't recommend breaking a tolerance break with a 100mg edible and definitely don't recommend it for newbies. Can 100% agree with this. I went cold turkey after being severely chronic for over a year. I was in the UK for a month and didn't have much access to good weed. I got back and made a rookie mistake. Went and hit a 1g bowl of what I used to daliy drive. I got so high I was seeing stars and my ears were ringing for awhile and made me super paranoid. If someone is new to weed I wouldn't recommend anything above 5mg.


jmb052

How was the food court?


missladyface

One time I did edibles and went to the mall. These were home made so who really know but we were chillin in Spencer’s when these two 13 year old kids start wandering over to the sex toys. The lady working walked up and said “hey guys, what are we shopping for?!” The boys jump and scurry off and I’m over in the corner, peaking, losing my shit. Like….I was making a scene I was laughing so hard for so long. The mall is absolutely the best place to enjoy an edible.


[deleted]

Jfc like 10 mg gets to me lol


CoopTrading

Lucky bastard there’s something wrong with me and my body doesn’t process edibles. Like at all. Best I’ve been able to come up with (clearly not something you can just talk to your doc about and have tests for) is that I may have lower enzyme levels of the enzyme that metabolizes it when ingested orally. A starter dose is 1000mg for me and it’s basically a pointless waste of money. Smoking or vaping always does the trick but I just cannot do it with edibles. And yes I’ve had the for sure real deal at gormet shops in legal states and even made my own. Every time I see someone had an experience like this I get so jealous!! I’ve never even felt it like that. Just a slight slight slight head change. I’ve even called people out for having bullshit before I realized the problem was me lmfao.


chlozero

going off this, my first edible experience was a trip. i was a seasoned smoker/dabber but never tried edibles simply because i didn’t care enough to try and find any. some girl i knew started making homemade cookies so i bought a few from her, not knowing what “170mg” meant. not knowing you’re not supposed to eat the WHOLE cookie in one go. the next 8 hours of my life were a blur, i thought my dad’s dog was trying to talk to me, i had an epiphany and went vegetarian, ended up eating 2 pints of ben & jerry’s while watching youtube. never again lol


fistofwrath

That's a LOT of THC. Glad it worked out for you.


ironicart

200mg of pure THC is an insane amount.. 5mg will get most people high


[deleted]

[удалено]


repzaj1234

How in the world. I once took 3 10mg gummies and had an existential crisis lol


Dabit56w

Thats bad ass haha. My first time smoking i smoked a joint with wax on the outside and i was taking hits from a pipe i was hella baked had the time of my life


bluewaffleisnice

The first time is always the best and then everytime after that is just chasing that first high


POPCOIN5

That’s what she said


xbeerseekerx

go big or go home


jiggywithit96

Got a big enough joint there Rick? Edit/ woke up to 1.2k likes and all these responses y’all made my day seriously lol


OclurFawn

6 paper joints are the best


Whit2781

I’d partake in a 6 paper joint any day. You got one right now you can send to me through the phone. Lmao!!! Don’t get it twisted, no pun intended. I’ll give you the weed, I just would like you to roll it and for that favor, we can smoke it together. Wouldn’t life be grand if we could send weed digitally. 😂😂


Agent_Ayru

Id endlessly roll any type of joint your heart desires if you're providing the weed lol


Whit2781

Nice pick!! I’m down.


[deleted]

>Wouldn’t life be grand if we could send weed digitally. 😂😂 New NFT idea.


16yYPueES4LaZrbJLhPW

"I bought an ounce!" "You bought the ***rights*** to an ounce, dumbass."


fman1854

You got a ounce but see value dropped and so all u have is a quarter now.


[deleted]

“This is Blockchain Haze, my favorite strain!”


SuperB7896

Non-fungible Toke-en…


worktogethernow

I think Amazon will beat you to the punch.


ChongoLikRock

Coupla hash coins too bud


BilboTBagginz03

The fucking way she goes


Wiringguy89

Fuck do you mean, "way she goes?!?" Where's all the money, Ray?


Paparrazzi

Way of the road bud


StardustJanitor

Ha. Haven’t watched the show in ages, this brought me back. Hash coin currency is the best.


carlosldsa

Shut up Julian


gantinho

Life isn't about getting high and eating chicken fingers


_theCHVSM

DYING over these TPB references hahah! …HE’S BREATHIN THROUGH THE JOINT!


wrecktangleTop

I spin more rhymes than a lazy Susan, and I’m innocent until my guilt is proven. Peaceeeee ✌️


_theCHVSM

HWUUAAHH?! payyyyce. hahahaha honestly j-roc is one of my all-time favorite characters of that show.


SpongeBobFruit

Gnomesayin!


wrecktangleTop

Yea same here haha


_theCHVSM

& as much as i hate cyrus, the “hubble-bubble-telescope” line slays every ounce of my soul hahahaha


wrecktangleTop

“My dad gave this to me when I was in grade 7, safety always off. Told me he was proud of me once. Fucken prick” 😂


_theCHVSM

..you feel that rand..? the way the shit clings to the air? rest in paradise, mr. lahey :(


gantinho

Fuck off I got shit to do


carlosldsa

You think you're so smurt and muscular well fuck off! 🖕🖕


STWAICM

I ate 8 cans of ravioli, no one wants to admit they ate 8 cans of ravioli


BootyUnlimited

I didn't want to say it, but Itoadaso. I freakin atodaso.


rcuthb01

9... 9 cans of ravioli.


Background_Ruin2626

It was 8 cans of ravioli actually lol


diz408808

Who's gotcher belly deedleedledee


WesternSlopeFly

i dont need to steal from books julian, I got my own thinks


psychoticshroomboi

Sexian


meliodas-dragon-sin

I’ll pay you a hundred dollars to FUCK OFF 🖕


carlosldsa

Cock suckers


Ralph212

Those were the good kind! 8 bucks!!


BaroqueObama1776

Fackin way she goes boys.


STWAICM

Stare into the shit abyss, and the shit abyss will stare back


the_tinsmith

Way of the road Bubs.


STWAICM

What Julian doesn’t grow, won’t burn him.


Squill__

JESUS CHRIST! HAVE ANOTHER DRINK RAY!


[deleted]

Frig of ricky


SnooStrawberries6011

Gettin there


genericteenagename

Is it fucked up that when I read this it was julians voice in my head


SgtStrongCock

Rub one out.


mistermasterkek

Frigg off.


pandaboy22

I fuckin love this line lmao


tonagnabalony

You won't remember anything suggested now, after smoking that, so no, no one has anything to suggest. Good luck, see you in a week!


yourTHIGHnesss

Lmfaooo SERIOUSLY!!


lordatropa

I don't think month has four letters.


zombiebuttcheeks

That thing should last him a very long time.


blakeburdab

I remember my first time smoking like it was yesterday. Weed doesn’t effect memory for me at least. Xanax on the other hand I can’t remember a thing. If anything weed can make memories more special and memorable. I journal everyday and have never been like “ah I smoked weed and forgot everything”


Strakdal

I forget shit if I smoke A LOT. Doesn't help I have Short-Term Memory Loss but smoking weed does tend to make me forget things.


tonagnabalony

But have you smoked that much weed at once? (Not saying OP did, but they wouldn't be able to confirm if so)


rango__exe

I’d suggest rolling a smaller joint if it’s your first time lol and listening to music with some good headphones Maybe having a snack too lol


cbass55379

He's not gonna be able to smoke 2% of it don't worry


RemoveLowsecCynos

He gunna start feeling it after 3 hits and be like hmmm maybe this was a bad idea


RonburgundyZ

But it wasn’t a bad idea. Everything will be fine. Drink some water and sink in the couch. Amirite?


DaemonRoe

Facts. Learned some transition tactics and they’ve helped with the adjustment from sober to high.


CPM17

Meditation helps a lot too. The anxiety and panic attacks from being super high was just my ego refusing to acknowledge the change from sober to high (and back down). We're the masters of our minds if we set our mind to it.


Dynosmite

I'd be fucking. shocked. if he could do three hits


RuchoPelucho

My first trip was listening to Dark Side of the Moon in the confort of my couch. Priceless!


Fascist_MechRengar

Pink floyd's songs are meant to be listened to while you're stoned and nothing convinces me otherwise


poonmachine420

Mushrooms will. I can’t explain the feeling I had while listening to them while tripping. I listened to them before but didn’t enjoy it but on mushrooms it was insanely different


rango__exe

I’ve been wanting to try mushrooms but I can never find them in my area or nobody has them that I know


poonmachine420

Me personally I don’t trust dealers and I prefer growing my own rather than picking but when I do pick it’s only 1 species because I can confidently say that it’s the one I’m looking for rather than something that looks similar. I’d look into growing your own it’s pretty cheap and easy to do


reverendsteveii

To pile on here, the spores are legal, as is all the equipment needed to grow them, but if you get busted growing them you're gonna catch a manufacturing charge. Do with this information what you will. edit: not entirely true at the state level, https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Legal_status_of_psilocybin_mushrooms has a detailed breakdown


rango__exe

Ahh Follow a few subs on here around the subject it’s very interesting just haven’t tried it yet I was kinda scared to


ThinAir719

r/unclebens. If you want a super easy method to grow some fungi check out this sub. Superrrrrr easy tek for growing.


reedstar1220

Cheech and chong tossed it in a van full of nuns afterwards but me personally I would superman that shit rite down tha hatch.


thegreatgatsB70

You need more weed for your first time. You aren't going to feel it off that little ass joint.


Thick_Sea9897

Done did him wrong😂


cold9999

Nah I had a 100mg edible my first time. Makes for a better first experience 😂😂


accelis

I seen some 1000mg chewy gummies and my only though was, "this shit gonna erase someone if they take it whole"


Notorious-B-I-G-A-Y

Uptade: im high af


jms199456

My guy! Congrats! You're gonna sleep tight tonight!


Hanshee

Bruh if I was to smoke that for my first time I wouldn’t be able to sleep. My mind would be racing in opposite directions


SweetJonesJunior

How much of it did u manage to smoke?


TheRidgeAndTheLadder

Yeah buddy! Play the album "The Dark Side of The Moon"


Chell115

Real talk here


23degreessss

If you have it play Doom. My first time playing it I was high af and it still to this day is my favourite gaming experience ever.


NediaMaster

Yea no shit dude 😂


LizmyLemon

Water.


mayhem-amigos

Watch Pineapple Express on Netflix


FecalOrgy

That is A LOT of weed! If it's really your first time, you'll be stoned stupid in 2 hits and possibly wasting a lot of that from burning and not smoking it. Roll a smaller one or just pack one pipe. Have a snack and hydrating drink on hand before you start smoking. Get comfortable because you might take a nap if you have a little too much.


Skullz-_-

theres no way hes not joking someone thats never smoked wouldnt be able to roll a joint like that


Zederikus

Yeah theres so much benefit of doubt getting given here its wholesome but no first timer can roll a chonger like this one


DabberAndy231

I wouldn’t smoke that whole thing for your first time if I were you Take like 4 hits, order a pizza, put on a stoner movie, and just chill. Best advice I can give ya.


ascot36

If it's your first time than good night my sweet prince 😂😂


el_chuyyyy

that joint is gonna last you well over a week if it’s your first time. your tolerance is gonna be nonexistent right now 💀


Full_Consideration_4

Bro you ain’t doing shit after smoking that monster


Citizen-BOOM

You're smoking that for your first time?... I'd tackle that thing in a couple of sittings mate or you will be a pile of unmoving flesh. Listen to your favourite music and discover things about it that you never did before or get suggestions for new music that you're in to. I always found that music always sounds better high. Oh and water!!!!! Not coke, water. That's coming from someone who doesn't like water. Stay hydrated.


Ok-Baseball-3544

That's a start but not near enough weed to get you high. You really need a good pipe. I recommend a bowl made of oak about 12 inches deep and 20 across. First you will need to find a good solid piece of oak. Next you will need a wood turning lathe and a set of bowl gouges. Once you have your bowl turned you will need to drill a hole and tap it out to screw in a plumbing pipe about 1/2 inch diameter. Next line the inside of the bowl using steel window screen. Now you are ready to smoke. The bowl will hold about a pound of good weed. Just light up and if you can smoke it all in under 10 minutes you will have a nice little buzz going.


Man_with_a_pan69

dude i’ll see you on pluto 😭😭 but i like to play a campaign type of video game or listen to music. if you’re worried about being too high just take a nap.


salsa_assassin

Idc if it's ur first time, YOU BETTER FINISH THAT JOINT


dawgwaht97

And don't throw away the rest of you don't.... Stupidest thing I did when I started was putting out half smoked joints then throwing them away. My homie smoked a blunt with me one day and I strait up threw the roach away and he almost tackled me.


Swimming-Ask-8394

Bro wtf😂. Did you think it was like no good after or what?


bri8985

Lmao I was going to say I’ve never heard of anyone throwing one away they couldn’t finish


charliem122

Don’t listen to these chumps! You smoke that 7g joint! You gonna be doin a whole lotta nothin tho


ghx1910

Survive?


straightspicydontmes

That’s a fatty for your first time, but listen to music or go look at nature or play video games or watch a show or do your favorite hobby etc


ccswimweamscc

Pretty sure u dont want to smoke this urself for the first time haha.


National-Dark-5924

Wash the trash


1Wubbalubbadubdub1

Screw, eat, sleep, repeat.


Traplover4ever

If you smoke all this bad boy my suggestion would be 1- Get in your bed 2- Don't panic, no one ever died from thc


Au91700

After smoking THAT for my first time? I’d probably lay down and try as hard as possible not to let my soul leave my body


hutchandstuff

Quit lying..


Intelligent_Papaya61

Hahahaha just make sure you finish that whole thing, THEN…….you will know what to do


OrdinaryChungus

Uh, go lie down


shug_was_taken

Do some chores. Fold and put away the dishes.


jeeeeez2

me and my friends(3 of us) use like 1g of weed and i was high for only 20minutes,should we use more?


rango__exe

Omg that nap finna hit different after this 😂


RollwiththeBest6565

Ya , doubt that’s your first joint


Rimoraj93

VR porn


card_board_robot

Yall really gotta leave this poor soul alone lmao


Bcoonen

Talking shit


Redeye7294

This ain't your first time if you smoking that guy


GoT_Eagles

Im guessing it’s actually not, but if by chance this really is your first time I think I should suggest you putting on a familiar show in the background and getting comfortable cause you’re not moving for a little while..


daltonjm_

beat ur shit trust me


Jake24601

Try and do anything after smoking that and tell us all about it.


ShortyDewOp

Prepare for 2022, jesus


wizbanggg

Finger your butthole


pooborus

Waste of chronic. Smoke a smaller doobie n youll feel like actually doing something fun. I assume you listened to music and fell asleep in a chair with munchies after this.


Downtown_funkystuf

Two words. “Taco Bell” my man


JediGodA3

Masterbate upside down. Thank me later.


ResearcherBasic4636

Moovie night with mom and dad


SiloOfPsilocybin

That’s either really loose or a fat doob


More_Ad7243

If it's the same stuff I have then I think you'd have a heart attack real quick either that or sleep for 8 hours