T O P
ElanaLois

You don't have to cringe, or ask why you let it happen. You meant it at the time. There's no Shame in that. Now, your mind has changed. People are allowed to change their minds. Tell your parents to respect the fact that you've changed your mind, and to stop sharing your business on the JW streets 🙄.


Satoshi_4

If only I can tell my parents to stfu haha


babslivesinphoenix

One day after careful planning and lots of courage


Godofwine3eb

Moving forward, just remember that you CAN NOT trust a JW in anything. They will back stab and use anything and everything against you and turn you into the Pharisees for it. Even your parents. No one is trustworthy.


Susan-stoHelit

Tell them to stfu - or - you will come out as full apostate.


Freskyjoe

I don't understand these guys, Why should you force kids against their will to keep privilege and status ?


Satoshi_4

They probably don't want to be the main topic inside the cong. because everyone is talking about each thing that happens to every JW they know


Freskyjoe

That's a toxic environment . Too much gossip


SavoryInk7554

I remember there was this one elderette who would use her husbands secretary privilege as a way to look into peoples files and then report back to other elderettes her “findings”. they would talk shit behind peoples backs after every meeting for hours.


tragomaskhalos

Each KH its own little police state with its own gestapo, and doubtless in turn reporting up to the big HQ. Repugnant and chilling.


ziddina

😱😱😱😱😱😱 Sounds typical...


Jehoopaloopa

Just keep in mind that if you give-in to getting baptized, it will ensure that you’ll be shunned when you leave. Staying unbaptized at least allows some room for loopholes.


Satoshi_4

I'm very determined to be unbaptized until I can live on my own, but it's very hard and challenging to stay calm about the things they're doing.


daylily61

Can you say to your parents "I'm not going to be baptized just because the two of you are embarrassed, or so Dad can be an elder again?" Or words to that effect?


babslivesinphoenix

Please continue to live your own life and build a career. I was told the end would come before 1980. Move on and be free.


Anti-Arbitrarian

Well what worked with my relatives was calmly saying that I don't want to be a witness anymore and that I understand that it makes them sad. But that they would surely agree that being a witness just because of the feelings of others is not the right reason. They agreed and they have mostly let me be since. Of course people are different, but showing that I knew that it was hard for them made them soften up a little. And me telling that I didn't find the joy or the will to worship with them helped them understand me. They had to agree that being a JW to please others wasn't good for anyone. Hopefully your folks can understand that too.


A-typ-self

If they bring it up to you, you could try saying something along the lines of, the pandemic made me realuze I was considering baptism for the wrong reasons. Baptism has to be about my personal relationship with God. Not bevause of social pressure or to make my parents happy. Its a very personal matter to me and according to the GB its supposed to be.


DebbDebbDebb

You had every right to say what you did. You have EVERY right to change your mind. Don't bother with anything they say. DO NOT LET THEM BLACKMAIL YOU WITH EMOTIONAL MANIPULATION. Whatever they say or do. I have changed my mind. Then smile and if they repeat , coherse etc just repeat calmly but I have changed my mind. Your mum is controlling and undermining you telling everyone basically lies. Thats her problem not yours. If others ask repeat calmly I have changed my mind. All the very best to you.


Stalker_Bait

You’re allowed to change your mind. Also a few points to consider: - Why didn’t Jesus get baptized as a child? - Is a life long contract something that a child could make in good faith? - Does being ready for a commitment like baptism also mean that you’re ready for a (far lesser) commitment like marriage? - If you don’t feel ready or willing for baptism then what does that say about Jehovah “drawing you to him”? - If you get baptized out of peer pressure can you honestly say that it was *your* decision? There are so many logical fallacies JW’s use to “reason” and you will likely not receive a single honest or forthcoming response to questions like these. Ultimately my point is, it’s **your** decision to make and always will be. If you allow someone else to influence you to make a decision I assure you, you will experience regrets. Save yourself the headache and set your boundaries now.


daylily61

Very well said 👍


lucid-heart

It's so disgusting how thet humiliate fathers to force their children to change. It's a system of fucked up policies designed to put huge amounts of guilt and pressure on you. They manipulate family ties to trap people in their cult. Don't worry about what you said before. If you've done some research here on the truth about "the truth" then nobody could argue you've learned facts that caused you to change your mind. Except the JWs because they don't care about the facts. This is why we don't care about their opinions.


ziddina

"because the CO questioned why arent anyone of my siblings including me are baptized"... If you were the only one not getting baptized, that would be one thing, but the fact that ALL of you have decided against baptism sure indicates that your parents screwed up royally at indoctrinating - forcing - I mean, "encouraging" all of you to get dunked. Congrats on having an entire family of smart siblings!


ThrowAyWeigh22

(Accidently hit send before I was done.) That's fucked up. Let's say you gave in, got baptized, and then told them you wanted to leave. They'd spin the entire thing back on you. They'd deny the gossip, and they'd say you're the one who chose this and they didn't force you, etc. Meanwhile they're basically holding your dad at gunpoint and making his progress in the org dependent on what his kids are doing. But remember guys and gals, they don't force people to get baptized, and they don't judge people.


Fazzamania

Probably the bloody cult that’s made you mentally weak in the first place. People change their minds and you can change hours.