Oh Leman Russ of the lake... Give us your wisdom
By - jigsawfghfghfg
HUNGER FOR BOOOORGARRRR
***[Cheers of Unfathomable Joy]***
Yes!! Our true purpose is clear! Eat! EAT! Booorgaaaaaarrr!!
MAKE THEM SUPPER!
#BRING ME ALL THE ORK YOU CAN FIND, I WANT TO SEE MY SON
Squig farming could be quite the lucrative enterprise. Get the right breed going, cultivate the mushrooms for the desirable temperaments, and pay retired guardsmen as ranchers. Vegan ranching that supports the troops... Never thought I'd see the day...
It would probably be a paradise for those guardsmen, considering what they've been through to get to retirement.
My thoughts exactly! A happy life of dedicated work after all the horrors of war.
You know, disregarding the life crippling ptsd they probably have
Just make sure you pull from Regiments that never face Orks. That should lower the PTSD triggers.
A side-gig of farming (if it's plant based) obscura could also help with the PTSD! Keep those boys and girls happy, safe, and busy.
You would be growing orks eventually but I bet they would love the squigs after they've butchered you
Not if you keep the ork ecosystem in check. The spores grow in conjunction with species grown and accumulates Waaaagh energy resonance. The ecosystem progression is mushrooms -> Squigs -> Grots -> Gretchin -> boyz -> oddboyz -> Nobz. If you kept the grots from tending the Shroom gardens and kept the population in check you'd effectively stop the eco progression and just get squigs.
Somewhere you are going to get Orks. Not on your farm sure but somewhere, under a rock or hidden in a forest you will surely get orks growing. The spores spread so fast and take root everywhere.
"You want works? Because that's how you get orks."
You don't "grow" nobz, boyz become nobz.
I have heard that it is edible, but stupidly tough.
Give it the Kobe beef treatment
It should go well with ALIEN BEANS!
STAND BACK I'LL SHOW YOU HOW IT'S DONE
*Kids in Krieg could have eaten those orks.*
Don't eat ork meat. Otherwise you will spread spores wherever you poop
Teenage Mutant Ninja Orks
No it ain't. its a Fungus animal hybrid. Garnishing your meat with shrooms doesn't make it vegan.
This is why we don’t take food advice from a talking tank.
Upvote for accuracy and also "Granishign".
Yep. Not vegan.
Oh thank god. I was beginning to think I was turning vegan.
I wouldn’t mind getting some Ork meat 🥰🤤
Slaanesh has already gotten this one
…imma call the inquisition real quick
Brother get the Flamer, The heavy Flamer
Orks don’t have “meat,” it’s more like… birds I guess.
ALZ YOUZ GETIN IZ MOI FIST UMIE
Aren't they also partially animal, though? Kind of like how a lichen is a fungus and algae in a composite organism?
In second edition they were so tough (and green) because they had a simbiotic relationship with an algae that helped them repair wounds and survive lethal trauma. Gorkamorka introduced the spore reproductive cicle we're now familiar with, but AFAIK never said they were just fungi so they keep being the same.
DEM BRAINY BOYZ WUZ SUPAH SMART! BEST NOT TO ‘URT YER HELMET STUMP WITH BIG THINKS LIKE THAT. JUST FOLLOW GORK ‘N MORK, KRUMP DA STOOPID ‘N PUNY ‘UMIES AND ELVES AND IT WILL ALL SHAKE OUT IN DA END.
Last time someone wrote it up? Yes. They spawn out of a vegetable "womb" in the dirt but they're animal themselves. Of course at that point you get into a debate of "how define vegan?" and "how define animal"?
I mean, I think the animal/vegetable/mineral line of classifications fell apart when we discovered certain members of the Protista kingdom have chloroplasts but aren't plants.
I know someone doing it because MASSIVE family history of colon cancer and going vegan drops the risk factors (and some other fringe health benefits).
That's it, she's just doing it for health reasons.
Do bees count? Also what about yeast! If yeast is vegan orks are vegan.
If i recall correctly, they're similar to lichens but don't really fit that definition, especially with fungi having no method of locomotion. 40K has some cool concepts in it, probably could not work IRL but an interesting idea nonetheless.
In this scenario though, the fungi in question would have a method of locomotion and communication.
The discovery of chloroplasts outside of plants isn't at all inimical to the basic concept of phylogeny, where would you get that idea?
It's really not that big a deal. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kleptoplasty
Fungi are not plants, and thus not vegetables.
Yeah, they're a separate kingdom of life. Though tbf any extraterrestrial organism would also be from a different tree.
Now get ready for xenos burger
What is the Inquisitorial ruling on comsuming orks?
If I had to guess they'd say that since Orks are filthy xenos, eating them would be heresy.
Well the rations taste like ass, and I’m all out of dead rats so gonna put some ork meat on them, and hope they don’t find out.
I dont think so man. Sure they are fungus based, but once something is sentient I'm pretty sure that makes it an animal.
Vegans don't think meat is the problem, they think eating sentient beings is the problem
lab-grown meat is vegan and ork stew is non-vegan
Despite the jokes Orks aren't mushrooms. They're flesh and blood *laced* with mushrooms. So Ork meat is about a vegan as ordering lettuce on your hamburger.
These portobello burgers are lookin awfully green
Technically all meat is made from plant matter at some point!
*furious Flesh Tearer noises*
Depends which edition you’re playing. RT orcs reproduce sexually.
Technical this not wrong 🤔🤔
Technically it is.
Veganism operates on the notion that an animal is unable to give consent to a human to consume its meat and other secretions, and therefor taking them is exploitation.
HOWEVER, if the Ork gave consent for you to consume its flesh, then the meal would be vegan.
You also have to consider, that you'd be inflicting suffering on a conscious being. If there was a concious fungus existant on todays planet earth it would be non-vegan aswell
Would the ork have felt suffering though? Assuming it atleast got a good fight in the end.
The Ork did give consent to kill it though, they love that shit. I assume they don't mind if their corpses were repurposed, I think I read they do it to 'umies so they probably expect it.
Veganism is okay with killing animals in self-defense, though, and killing Orks is always self-defense. Once they're dead, they can't suffer, so it's okay to eat them.
the memes in this community are pretty stagnant.
“Do Orks taste like mushrooms?” -bell (I think) from girls play, seconds after watching a massive Ork WAG make its way towards hive Helsreach
Sauté de champignons
[Le Fishe au Chocolat ](https://youtu.be/EApem1uUwpg)
Probably not a great idea to eat tho
Is ork meat edible to things other than orkz?
To the tyranids biomass is biomass.
Real question is if you eat an orks do you get high? Or Does it only apply to certain Orks like weird boyz. Also would tripping balls on Ork shrooms attract the attention of Slaanesh?
Veganism isn't just about a plant based diet, it's about consent, too. If something does not consent or is being coerced into being exploited, it's not Vegan. Even if Orks were fully plant based (which they aren't, as other users in this threat pointed out) it still wouldn't be vegan to eat them because they don't want to be eaten.
What exactly constitutes veganism then? Because all food is derived from a living being that didnt consent to be eaten.
Fungi are genetically closer to animals than it is to plants but we consider them vegetarian still!
not technically, it is vegan...Orks are just space fungus
Wasn't expecting wisdom from a tank named after probably one of the dumbest primarchs the great crusade has seen.
(re-written so I'm not being offensive this time, didn't mean to do that the first one, sorry)
Ya eetz uz we killz ya aneewayz
I would argue vegetarian not vegan, because brocoli is green.
It’s not tho
Actually it's not. Orks are a hybrid of fungi and mammal.