Yes, by all means, walk 20 feet ahead of your wife and children, you asshole.
By - TwerkshireSausage
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Yup it’s disrespectful as fuck. My mom divorced my dad in the early 90s. He was often abusive but the things that stuck most with her that sting years later were the little ways he disrespected her. She told me that when we were babies, he’d leave her to struggle with the diaper bag, car seat, groceries, whatever. And he’d just walk ahead leaving her in the dust every time.
Good for your mom! My dad was a lot of things, but being uninvolved was never one of them.
My ex parked extremely far away every time we went to a store and said he didn’t want anyone hitting his very used car. I tired easily from dealing w twins and multiple surgeries and this was his excuse every single time.
If he cared he would have dropped you first then parked and walked over with the children. What an asshole
My daughter’s sperm donor, who is now thankfully dead would honest for God (we got back together for a short time when she was an infant) He would grab the diaper bag and make me carry that heavy carry-all all by myself. No shame. He was about 350 pounds and I was 125 pounds both about 5’3”. I won’t do it again!
My father did very similar things
Because they’re busy commenting “😍😍“ under porn stars’ social media instead of being real men and taking care of their families
Ugh I hate this so much! I walk my dogs and see girls walking-running after their boyfriends cause they walk 10 feat ahead of them. F them, it's humiliating and they know it
>Picture the following:
A mom, walking with a stroller/baby carrier while also trying to wrangle multiple toddlers, flustered and doing her best. About 10 paces ahead of her? Her baby daddy/husband/boyfriend, walking very fast and ahead of his family, face buried in his smartphone, while neglecting the fact that the MOTHER OF HIS CHILDREN is lagging behind him.
no, your eyes did not deceive you!
I've seen it too. I have experienced it.
We are not the first and we will not be the last.
I always got the impression that it's not only disrespectful to walk ahead of somebody but that the man doing it wants to appear single / unattached to "potential lays".
same with the men that never wear their engagement ring but they don't have a reason not to (like doctors, sculptors and so on.
LOL my ex used to tell me that if we ever got married (barf) that he wouldn't wear his wedding band on his finger, but on a chain around his neck under whatever shirt he was wearing so that he could "keep our love and relationship private."
Uhh genius, isn't the whole point of a wedding band to show off to the world that you're taken and unavailable? It's exactly as you say - they want to give off the vibe that they are single.
Private from who? The paparazzi? Does he fancy himself a celebrity?
YES It's happened to me and I hate this feeling. Like, what's even the point of this walk if you won't even walk beside me?
"You're going slow!", okay well we aren't in a hurry and I'm not going THAT slow.
"Speed up, come up here with me", uh no motherfucker, you come back here with ME! Even if I catch up, you're gonna run ahead again.
The next time this happens I'm going to go even slower and pretend I'm single and am not walking with anyone. Fuck it, I'll even pull out my phone and call my best friend while he walks ahead of me.
One piece of advice from Shera7 on YouTube that I found interesting...
If a man walks ahead of you - distract yourself with something. Linger at the window of the dress shop, start chatting to a cute doggo.
Make him stop and wonder where you are. If he just keeps walking into the sunset. Fuck him. Just catch an uber home or find a nice cafe and buy yourself a matcha tea.
If he says "WhERe DID YoU Go??" Just blank him and say - well you were walking so far ahead I am not surprised you didn't notice.
Put it back on him.
Find the most well dressed, attractive man you can. Doesn't have to be Jason Momoa, just someone a notch better in looks/style than your partner, maybe a younger man. A waiter and just start chatting and laughing and enjoying their company.
When your man notices he will become all butthurt. He will be confused and ask you what you are doing.
Just be like " Oh this young man was commenting on my dress. He really liked it". Let your man know you are not just someone he can walk away from. You are a beautiful woman who men would love to be in the company of - and other men notice it.
Don't tolerate shit behaviour - apply a consequence.
Why is this getting so many upvotes? This is NOT FDS standard advice! Block and delete, you don't 'train' the scrotes. You choose yourself and move on.
We need to focus more on getting women not to procreate with these men so they can go extinct in the next few decades
Now THERE'S a dating strategy, cull the pool lol
Truly that is the end goal of FDS. To get women to realise their worth and NOT date pieces of shit, thereby culling them from the planet.
My ex did this to me all the time. Once we were out with another couple - he and the girl from the other couple strolled off ahead - and the dude from the other couple waited for me and slowed down to make sure I was okay.
It was weird.
I’m glad he’s now my ex.
This is my dad. He's not on his phone, he's nearly 70 now and never had a smart phone. But he will 'take his wife out' somewhere (which is extremely rare, but he will make a big deal about how great he is for it) and just walk to the place at his own fast speed, completely leaving her behind. Every bloody time. Then be impatient cause he has to wait for her at the destination.
I could write a book on what's wrong with my dad and the abuse and neglect he bestowed on his wife and children, and the severe consequences of it.
It's kind of scary to realise that the only reason I thought my ex was perfect was because he didn't have the same 'set' of disgusting traits as my dad. He just had different ones. But oh how you swoon over the things you grew up learning you never deserved.
This is the only place I've found where I can just say "fuck men". I don't need to qualify it. We all know.
I've only just started realising how all of the things that have really destroyed me were caused by the men I've had closest to me in my life. My dad, my brother, my exes. Then there is the general swarm of men through life that you have to swat away, that take little bites out of your already-struggling self-esteem. Their entitlement and lack of empathy is just ... clinical.
Sorry. I kinda got going there! Your post obviously resonated haha.
Y’all are writing my life story here. My narc dad destroyed my brother’s and my mental health psyche. Almost 30 and I am just now starting to feel somewhat healthy and secure. But he’s the victim when I bring this up, he’s even gotten threatening and aggressive with me. My life mantra with men used to be “as long as he’s nothing like my dad”. But as you say, that still leaves a lot of room for LVMs.
Hey sis - my dad was a piece of shit too.
Feel your accumulated pain. Shitty dad = shitty brother and also equals shitty relationships because you model your attraction on how you are used to being treated. And how you are used to being treated is a very, very low bar.
Lol I saw this the other week on my run and managed to yell out a hearty "DUMP HIM SIS" when I turned the corner 😂🤣
I see it too and I probably live half a World away from you (Eastern Europe). No matter where, scrotes gonna scrote.
I also noticed something else. Imagine this: a couple walks home from grocery store/supermarket and the bag with groceries is carried by the woman. WTF. It's almost always young people, I think the older generations men have more pride than to let their wives carry bags (although they may have other LVM traits). Literally 6 days ago on my way to work I saw couples of maybe 30-35 year old and the woman carried 6-pack of 1,5 liter bottles of water (which is 9 kg or 19,84 lbs). The man carried nothing, too occupied with his phone.
I bet she was proud of herself. I bet she was proud that he picked her.
I like to think so, too. Even LVM of the olden days would be ashamed to let their wives do the heavy lifting, lest others in public see that he's basically treating his wife like a pack mule and feel shamed. There's no shame now.
My ex LVM husband was notorious for this. Something I’d like the point out, is that the relationship never starts out that way. In the beginning he always held the door open. He walked next to you holding your hand and asking about your day. He immediately took anything heavy so you didn’t have to carry it. But then once he “has” you, this shit starts. This is part of the reason I roll my eyes when men say women tricked them (by doing things such as dressing up for dates or wearing makeup). Men literally fake being a good person. They trick women into relationships with them.
Millennial men watched their dads do it and they liked the power dynamic. Rinse and repeat
The generation before was like that too?
My dad did it and I saw others do the same
I've seen men in their 60s walk ahead of their wives, probably not wanting to be seen with an older woman as their partner. I once saw one man in his 60s race ahead of his staggering, injured, spouse at the entrance to the ER where he was taking her. Probably just habit on his part.
But if the woman a man is with is young and beautiful, notice he is waling close and holding her hand.
my ZVM dad did it all the time, he did it once when i was carrying several bags of heavy groceries(I was 12?he was carrying some bags as well) and he disappeared, had to call the cops cause I was lost in the city (ended up finding my way home to mum's).
My ex used to do it, also my sister, so fucking annoying.
My ex did this to me constantly he apparently couldn’t help it cause I was so short with short legs so his strides were naturally longer then mine 🙃 no he could help it he was just a selfish dick who only cared about himself
Yup my LVM did this ALL the time as soon as his mask came off. General walks, grocery shopping, hikes ARGH. It ended up being where I was being taken care of from his friend when we went on hard hikes because my ex was already so much more ahead of us. JERK and a COWARD 🤢
How long did it take for the mask to come off?
I would say there were many times his mask slipped very early on but officially it slipped off completely after 9months.
I’m in a major metropolitan city and I notice this. But what chaps my ass even more is when it’s just them and their kids and they leave their 4 year old on a tricycle like 100 ft (bit of an exaggeration but still) behind them, totally clueless or focused on the older child. It really angers me, their child could get hurt or snatched up in a second and it’s like they sincerely don’t care. I’ve seen dads not turn around for MINUTES to check on their small child. I always keep an eye on them just in case but how sad is it a stranger has to watch and care about the well-being of your kid for you.
Men are so worried about appearing alpha In front of strangers that they neglect their own children
I literally saw a dad do something like this in target, he stared at me when I was walking out of a changing room, then as I headed his direction for the exit him he started striding down the aisle looking "nonchalantly" at his phone while his 4 or 5 year-old son ran behind him to keep up and tried to talk to him (and was ignored). Do they think if they're enough of a shitty father women will forget they have a kid??
I saw this with a man crossing a busy street last week. He was paying more attention to his dog than to his three year old daughter 10 feet behind him. The mom was not with them.
You can kind of see the devolution. You see young couples that are near 30 with their first child and they are all cute holding hands and pushing the stroller together and I think wow I wish I was her. Then 10 years down the line it's that scenario with the mom ringing multiple kids of varied ages with a huge purse that contains everyone's stuff and the dad is 20 feet ahead with just his pants.
My ex husband did this! Thank God I got away and divorced him when I could!! We would go to the grocery store and it would take me 20-30 minutes to go shopping and that long to find him. It was so bad that he would talk to people he knew and would completely ignore me, wouldn’t even acknowledge that I was his wife. At first I thought it was an accident but it happened every single time. I was married eight and dated seven but I am so grateful I’m through! Until God has given me who He chooses for me I am going to stay single. I always wondered why and now I know. I’m so glad I found this sub!!
It makes me sad I have men in the family that do this. I get confrontational with them about it, but it doesn't go anywhere because "that's just how they are".
I've noticed this for years. Always wondered if anyone else noticed it too.
My dad does this all the time. He did it when we were in a different country, where you can easily be scammed or pick pocketed. And he does it when he’s out with my mum. It’s so rude. What’s the point of a family outing if you’re gonna walk way ahead and not spend time with us?
I've also had men insist that they will "wait in the car" while their wive wrangles multiple children and their supplies on their way to go somewhere. My dad did that and I've seen it repeatedly. Disgusting.
It’s his status points. That’s all family is to them. Never marry and bare a man’s children.
yeah.. this happened to me as a kid. Might have gotten kidnapped if it wasn't for my mum.
Isn’t that also unsafe for the wife and kids? If something happens to one of them or someone tries to hurt them the husband would be too far away to do anything in time or even notice what’s happening.
But men expect us to believe they are “protectors”. Yet they can’t even do the bare minimum to protect their own family.
I wouldn’t be surprised if a lot of these lvm would run off instead of helping their family if there was any danger.
I smack them on the chest or arm or whatever if they do this to me. I grab them. I tell them I’m small and a slow walker and they must adjust to my pace. I don’t care if they are my friends or my date. It’s basic decency to adjust your speed to be able to walk with the people you’re hanging out with!